Questions are good. When we ask them, we gain knowledge. And, knowledge is power.

At times, even those of us who identify as members of the LGBTQ community have questions, both about our friends and ourselves. Asking them appropriately and politely helps provide a greater understanding. One question which seems to arise quite often surrounds the phrase bi-curious.

WebMD defines bi-curious as “...the term used for someone who typically has sexual relations with one gender, but is curious about having sex with a different gender.” This term can be used as a descriptor for heterosexual people or those who identify as a member of the LGBTQ community.

When a person is bi-curious, it does not necessarily mean that they have acted upon their interests. In fact, it can simply refer to their thoughts.

Some people tend to confuse being bi-curious and bi-sexual. While the words may sound similar, they are not the same things. Those who identify as bisexual are attracted to individuals of both genders. Those who are bi-curious are attracted to people of a different gender than they have been with in the past. 

Being bi-curious does not mean you are gay. 

Consider this. If you are a lesbian and bi-curious, you may be interested or attracted to men. If you experiment and realize that you are, you may discover that you are bisexual or heterosexual. That said, being bi-curious CAN mean you are gay. Each situation is unique and understanding your true self is critical to your happiness.

In a perfect world, we would all be free to experiment and understand to whom we are truly attracted and why.  Unfortunately, we don’t live in a perfect world. Discrimination exists and those who are bi-curious are often not comfortable trying new things. Some are concerned with how they will be viewed. Perhaps their family and friends are not LGBTQ-friendly.

If you know someone who is bi-curious you can reassure them that questioning is common, they are not alone; they don’t need to define themselves immediately. Be patient and understanding. After all, love is love.